Nap time Anarchy

I've always considered myself pretty lucky when it came to Liam's sleep habits. Since the day we came home from the hospital he has been a great little sleeper at night. After the first few weeks of obligatory every 2-3 hour feedings he began getting up only once a night to nurse. He never had his days and nights mixed up and it took very little effort to get him down in the evening. Now Liam is even beginning to sleep through the night. Sounds like I should be set up for the perfect sleeping newborn, but not so much. My son refuses to take a nap. He has literally declared war on nap time and it has been a constant battle for day time sleep for the last six weeks.

I have tried everything... seriously everything to get him to sleep; and the second I find something that works, it doesn't anymore. From rocking, to walking, to wearing, to special toys that light up and play music (see Albi the seahorse) to purchasing a swing with funds that should not have been spent out of sheer desperation. I know all the jargon out there says that babies will sleep when they need to but I'm telling you, Liam is a special jellybean when it comes to naps. If/when he doesn't sleep he can be fed, changed, played with and checked over a million times and still be the crankiest stinker in the world. He needs his sleep. So I'm finally going to try and do the one thing I never thought I would do as a parent, I'm going to put him on a schedule and come hell or high water I will try to make him stick to it.

You see I was of the warm fuzzy school of thought with newborns. You know the let them eat, poop, sleep, play when they want and my job as a mother is to comfort, feed and coddle. But that just doesn't work for Liam. He wants to be held, but he gets fussy being held too much. He wants to be rocked to sleep but gets squirmy and wakes himself up because he is uncomfortable. I know he is capable of sleeping in his crib and self soothing because he does it at night. But not so during the day.

So to bring order to Liam's nap time anarchy I am instigating rituals, routines and rules for nap time. I see no other way and I will not negotiate with terrorists (yes, Liam is a terror when he doesn't get adequate sleep).

All the Single Ladies....

Ok all my single friends out there. I have one attractive brother-in-law who is a great catch and looking for a date and I am shamelessly trolling for him.

Strengths:

Marine; yes he's ripped, in great shape and can kill a man with his bare hands. Basically, he will protect.

Great with Kids. Just one look at the photo says it all.

Aspires to a career in criminal justice system. His deep rooted chivalry drives him to serve his fellow Americans.

Check out those eyes, yes his lashes are real.

Weaknesses:

He cares too much, works too hard, has a sensitive side that makes him a romantic and is looking for commitment.

If you are interested call, email, text, whatever. There will be a minor screening process by me because really, lets be honest, for as good a catch as he is I'm gonna make sure I get an equally awesome future sister-in-law.

Letting your freak flag fly at the Scottish Festival

Two weekends ago Fred and I made the Scottish Festival a tradition by going for the second year in a row; and like last year we had a blast. Here you see Freddie pushing Liam around in a stroller. Isn't he a good looking father.

Anyway, now that I've posted a gratuitous picture of my excessively attractive hubby I will get to why I am blogging about the Scottish Festival. While I honestly do enjoy the environment, the games and the food, there is one thing about this particular Festival that just makes me bust out laughing... and its the fact that it brings out all the weirdies. I'm not talking about the die hard Scotsmen, I'm talking about the sword wielding, goth dressed, straight of a Renaissance Fair cliche weirdies. I'm asking myself why a celebration of heritage equals a medieval convergence of characters straight out of Dungeons and Dragons. It's not that it bothers me, if anything it makes it so much more of a rich experience to see so many people gathered in one place who feel they were born in the wrong time period. The historian in me just laughs at them because little do they understand that the time period they romanticize was probably the most miserable time to be a human on earth. But at the same time I both pity and admire their draw to gather at one of the few places where their strange obsession is actually accepted. How many of us have secret obsessions that are considered socially awkward? Whether its practicing for your fantasy American Idol audition in the shower, putting together one of your many fantasy football teams, or having imaginary conversations in your car during traffic. Wouldn't it be great to have a safe place to meet others with the same weird quirks? So here's to you goth dressed guy with the broad sword across your back, and here's to the rest of us finding a place to let our freak flag fly.

Albi the Seahorse's namesake.

Liam is the worst daytime nap taker and I was getting desperate. So I bought Liam a new toy this weekend in the hopes that it would live up to the hype of putting babies to sleep. It didn't work exactly as I had hoped but it does calm him down. Anyway, this blog post is the story of how the Seahorse toy got his name. You see for some reason I referred to the seahorse as Liam's dragon because honestly that's what it looks like to me (see picture). Freddy found in my species confusion a funny link to one of our favorite bands, Flight of the Concords who have a song about a racist Dragon named Albi. In honor of that ballad we have lovingly named Liam's new toy Albi. So, for your listening pleasure follow the link to hear Albi's name sake and the tale of the racist Dragon and his Albanian boy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-jVAHAuiS4

Just in case you didn't know what Heaven looked like

I have discovered that there are times as a new Mommy when you know that the wreck that is now your body thanks to baby, the sleepless nights, and the fact that the clean clothes you just put on will be covered in some kind of infant bodily fluid in the next ten minutes is worth it... That picture says it all for me. Yep, it's so worth it.

One month in and I'm ready to throw in the towel

So I'm one month into motherhood and I'm ready to call it quits. Not that I would ever want to get rid of my little bundle of joy... I'd just like someone else to step in and do all the hard parts so I can just enjoy him.

Hind sight is 20/20 when it comes to motherhood. The first couple of weeks were cake, not that I knew it then. I was bored out of my mind and wanted nothing more than to get out of the house. But I had to stay home and "recover." All Liam did was eat, sleep and poop. I actually woke him up a few times because I was so mind numbingly bored and I wanted something to do. Then he hit the two week mark and life changed. He started having more awake time (like an extra hour or two a day) as well as fighting sleep. Yes, my son will be flat out exhausted and he will fight falling asleep like he will never wake up again if he gives in. I will hold, rock and bounce him for an hour until he is finally dead gone to the world, then the second I lay him down his eyes pop open and he screaming. I've considered colic and while Liam does have gassy days it is not simply that. My child just won't sleep.

I should count myself blessed though because he does sleep most nights. I do have to get up twice a night for the obligatory feedings, but then he passes right back out. But during the day is a nightmare.

I wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have to go back to work in a week. I could continue to play mom extraordinaire and that would be alright. I can take it... I'm his mom. But instead I will be leaving Liam with my Mom to watch during the day. Don't get me wrong my Mom is amazing and aside from Freddie I couldn't feel any more comfortable leaving Liam with anyone else. But because my son is no small angle child who sleeps the day away and is instead and semi high needs baby, the guilt of passing him off to my Mom to deal with is added to my guilt of leaving my child.

Speaking of guilt... that's one thing you don't read about in the pregnancy books. No one tells you how much guilt follows having a baby. Suddenly I feel guilty about everything from reading while feeding Liam instead of "bonding" with him to ignoring his fussing at 3 a.m. to get an extra 5 minutes of sleep until he really starts to rev up the lungs. Yes, motherhood goes hand in hand with guilt. From the moment you find out you are pregnant and get the list of no-no foods, until the day you die, you will feel guilt over everything.

Right now I feel guilty for blogging while Liam is blessedly napping instead of doing my very large pile of laundry.